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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #2601
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    I looked out of my window in horror yesterday as a crowd gathered around a crashed motorcyclist.

    I rushed outside yelling, "Let me through, let me through!"

    A man at the front said, "Thank God for that, are you a Doctor?"

    I said "No, that's my Pizza."
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  2. #2602
    Established TDF Member Paulo's Avatar
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    If anyone knows of an elderly person who will be eating xmas dinner on there own please inbox me their address as i need to borrow some chairs ...
    Remember anything you read on the internet was probably written by some guy sitting at home in his underpants! Including this !!

    Illegitimi non carborundum

  3. #2603
    Dive tart, and 'tog Pete Bullen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spirit of Guernsey View Post
    To be considered a genuine cockney Christmas tree, you have to have been planted within the sound of the baubles...
    Nice to see Tim Digger liked this, he must have "got" it
    Diving, and photography holidays in Gozo
    Private guiding, don't follow the crowd.
    http://oceanfoto.co.uk/

  4. #2604
    Established TDF Member steelemonkey's Avatar
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    Why do Marxists like fruit infusions?
    Because all proper tea is theft.
    Paul.
    If God had meant us to breathe underwater, he would have given us larger bank balances.
    Human beings were invented by water as a means of moving itself from one place to another.

  5. #2605
    Established TDF Member jamesp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by steelemonkey View Post
    Why do Marxists like fruit infusions?
    Because all proper tea is theft.
    Fruit infusion sounds like a decent summation of Marxisim; sounds like a good idea, but the reality is a bit thin on taste, generally has an unpleasant smell about it , and leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

  6. #2606
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    A lot of colourful leaflets though the letterbox over the last few weeks, each full of promise, offering very different tempting visions of the future, with a lot of numbers to try and think about and costs to consider. Are they true, are they fake, can they really deliver? But after a long and often challenging exchange of views, and a lot of personal soul searching, I've finally made my mind up.

    I'll get a Chinese takeaway tonight!
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  7. #2607
    Octopus Ink Team gpj's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spirit of Guernsey View Post
    A lot of colourful leaflets though the letterbox over the last few weeks, each full of promise, offering very different tempting visions of the future, with a lot of numbers to try and think about and costs to consider. Are they true, are they fake, can they really deliver? But after a long and often challenging exchange of views, and a lot of personal soul searching, I've finally made my mind up.

    I'll get a Chinese takeaway tonight!
    I'm going to nick that
    Find us on FB - Casnewydd Scuba.

  8. #2608
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    Quote Originally Posted by gpj View Post
    I'm going to nick that
    Likewise!

    I can't believe I am actually nicking an SOG joke

  9. #2609
    Wet again. DRB79's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neilwood View Post
    Likewise!

    I'm adding myself to this list
    All the best
    Dave

  10. #2610
    Prior Member Tim Digger's Avatar
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    I quite often nick SOGs jokes. Those I understand anyway!
    Evolution is great at solving problems. It's the methods that concern me.
    Tim Digger


 

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