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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #2401
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    What's the difference between a large pizza and a Padi instructor..................

    A pizza can feed a family of 4

  2. #2402
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    We ordered a Chinese takeaway from a local place (I won't name them). I went to pick it up and as I was driving home, I heard the bags rustling and moving!! I thought what the hell is that? Has something got in the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out at me. I was driving, so I slowly leaned forward, picked up the bag and carefully put it on the passenger seat, and there it was again, more rustling and little eyes looking out behind the prawn crackers. I thought it's got to be a rat or a mouse or something because of what's been in the news lately about local take-aways and food ratings, so I carefully pulled the bag down ...
    And there it was ...

    ... A Peeking Duck!!!

  3. #2403
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    Man goes into a pub.

    The barman says "We dont serve exotic fruit here."
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  4. #2404
    Prior Member Tim Digger's Avatar
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    I'm still thinking about that one?
    Evolution is great at solving problems. It's the methods that concern me.
    Tim Digger

  5. #2405
    Remember, remember Adrian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tim Digger View Post
    I'm still thinking about that one?
    Remove a space...

  6. #2406
    Prior Member Tim Digger's Avatar
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    Ah. Nah.
    Evolution is great at solving problems. It's the methods that concern me.
    Tim Digger

  7. #2407
    Established TDF Member steelemonkey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tim Digger View Post
    I'm still thinking about that one?
    Quote Originally Posted by Adrian View Post
    Remove a space...
    Quote Originally Posted by Tim Digger View Post
    Ah. Nah.
    Still lost.
    Paul.
    If God had meant us to breathe underwater, he would have given us larger bank balances.
    Human beings were invented by water as a means of moving itself from one place to another.

  8. #2408
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    Quote Originally Posted by steelemonkey View Post
    Still lost.
    why do we have to put up with SOG's jokes i say we pitchfork him and burn him on the stake

  9. #2409
    Established TDF Member steelemonkey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alby R View Post
    why do we have to put up with SOG's jokes i say we pitchfork him and burn him on the stake
    Ooooh yes.

    nearest gas station to my location right now
    Paul.
    If God had meant us to breathe underwater, he would have given us larger bank balances.
    Human beings were invented by water as a means of moving itself from one place to another.

  10. #2410
    Established TDF Member steelemonkey's Avatar
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    How come I got a random link as well?
    Paul.
    If God had meant us to breathe underwater, he would have given us larger bank balances.
    Human beings were invented by water as a means of moving itself from one place to another.


 

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