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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #2611
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    Santa’s sledge broke down on Christmas Eve. He flagged down a passing motorist and asked “Can you help me fix my sledge?”

    “Sorry” the motorist replies “I’m a podiatrist not a mechanic."

    “Well can you give me a toe."
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  2. #2612
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    A little girl goes to a pet shop and asks, "Excuthe me. Do you have any widdle wabbits?"

    The shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he is on her level and says, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft, fluffy bwack wabbit, or one like that widdle bwown one over there?"

    The little girl blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and whispers.

    "I don't wealy fink my pyfon gives a f***!"

    (the above shamelessly nicked from the cyclechat forum. Usually it's the other way round

  3. #2613
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    Every Christmas we'd run downstairs to the big pile of presents and start unwrapping them as fast as we could. Sometimes there would be fights over who had the best gifts but we would all make up later and sit down to have a three hour dinner before watching telly for the rest of the day. I really miss working at the Royal Mail sorting office.
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  4. #2614
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    I periodically feel like swearing...….

    but then I think Iron, Carbon, Potassium that....
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  5. #2615
    Established TDF Member JimmE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spirit of Guernsey View Post
    I periodically feel like swearing....

    but then I think Iron, Carbon, Potassium that....
    Took me a moment... 😂


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  6. #2616
    Established TDF Member jamesp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JimmE View Post
    Took me a moment... ��


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    might of worked better if they were in sequence.

  7. #2617
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesp View Post
    might of worked better if they were in sequence.
    I was thinking that myself.

  8. #2618
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesp View Post
    might of worked better if they were in sequence.
    They are.
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)

  9. #2619
    Established TDF Member jamesp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spirit of Guernsey View Post
    They are.
    only if you read it backwards; there again, starting with the punchline could be seen as an improvement....

  10. #2620
    Established WTF Member Spirit of Guernsey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesp View Post
    only if you read it backwards; there again, starting with the punchline could be seen as an improvement....
    I think that you are making up your own joke.
    There are four varieties in society: the lovers, the ambitious, observers and fools. The fools are the happiest.
    Hippolyte Taine French critic and historian (1828-93)


 

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